We live in a world that doesn’t seem to have time for anything. Life is a monotonous journey from point A to Point B and we seem to be caught up in a particular race against time to reach a destination that we have created in our minds. The world has changed over the past few decades and it has truly become a better place in many respects. Yet somewhere along the way it seems like people have lost track of actually living the journey of life itself. We are more focused on reaching the destination we have envisioned for ourselves ,than actually living it.
Focusing on what you have achieved
In a constant battle to get to our final goal which we consider to be our perfect situation, we put constant pressure on ourselves to take us closer to that perfect situation. Life does not always go on a straight road and at times we will have to find a different path to the same destination. That is just how life works. Yet many of us blame ourselves constantly for not achieving your goals in the time frame you set out to when you started your journey. We put on exceptionally high expectations on ourselves and when we do not live up to it we are disappointed. This constant disapproval on your own actions is what being hard on yourself really is. We focus on what we could not achieve and forget the entire journey we have taken and what we have achieved so far because we only focus on the final destination.
It is completely normal to get caught up in your final outcome and be hard on yourself. In this modern world we reward people for their final achievement and not the journey they take. Do not be so hard on yourself because it will lead to unhappiness and bitterness. You will constantly focus on the negative aspect and not appreciate yourself for what you have done already, and in doing so the journey will never be truly appreciated. Do not focus on why you are not in the place you imagined yourself to be in, but rather focus on what you have done so far. However small it maybe appreciate yourself for what you have been able to accomplish. Even if you wasted an entire year without focusing on your goals but you managed to focus on them for even a single day appreciate it. Be thankful and happy for that. It is better to be happy for a single day than be unhappy and bitter at yourself throughout your entire journey.
There is no clear Cut Path
Life is a journey. We set out on this path from the day we are born. We search for a destination to reach. It will never be a smooth journey to anyone. At some point in our lives we will have to change course to reach the same destination and we are hard on ourselves for having to find a new path or because of the delay that it produces. The journey of life is similar to a path of a river. Throughout its journey the river encounters many obstacles such as mountains , boulders and even cities. But it has only one destination which is the majestic ocean. The journey is tough and many times the river has to change course and find a path which might take a longer duration, but finally it reaches the ocean. So just like the river in our journey we will encounter many obstacles which will force us to find a different path and at times an entirely new path that is unfamiliar to you. If you focus on those obstacles as being your fault, it will bring you only unhappiness. So do not be hard on yourself. We all have to find new paths at some point in our lives and quite often we may not be able to reach our destination in the time we wanted to. That is not your fault. That is what life is. Therefore understand and accept things which are not in your control. You do not need to blame yourself for all the delays and different paths you have to take. Just like the river you will reach your destination on your own time and in the path that was set out by destiny.
Do not Compare yourself to others
In a social media crazy world it is easy to get lost in the outside world and lose track of your own life. It’s easy to see the journey that others take now more than ever, and if we are not careful we will compare our life to another. In doing so we tend to be hard on our self. “Why have I not achieved as much as person X or Why am I not doing what person Y is doing ” It becomes toxic to a level where you are always hard on yourself and blame yourself for not being in the same position as the person you are comparing yourself to. It is a dangerous path , but sadly it is a common feature of our world today. What you must understand is that each person has his/her own journey. Circumstances and opportunities are different across the globe. The moment you focus on another is the moment you lose yourself. Each person is unique in their own right. Each one of us is special. You must understand that what you bring to the world no one else can bring. There is no particular destination that is better than all others. The world can only function if we all reach the destination that we wish to achieve. Further you do not know if the person you are comparing yourself to is actually happy or whether the destination he/she wanted was different. Success and wealth may bring joy for a while, but what true success is measured by, is how happy you truly are, and how content you are with your life. If you are truly content with your life and happy, then you are more successful than many people could ever dream of. So do not compare your life to others and blame yourself. Each person is special and unique.
Finally What I want to say is if you were hard on yourself that is okay. But remember when you feel like that
- Focus on what you have achieved already and feel happy and proud for it and do not focus on your final destination.
- There is no correct smooth path to reach your final goal. There will be many paths to take and it will take its own time. Therefore focus on the journey and do not miss out on it.
- Do not compare yourself to others. You are special in your own right.
